‘Traumatic Brain Injury: A Caregiver’s Journey’

Posted by Navajo Times | Nov 30, 2023 | Community |

WINDOW ROCK – On an overcast July Sunday in 2016, Ruth Bitsui decided on a whim to decline a dinner invitation and accompany her husband of 40 years, Edison Bitsui, to steer roping practice.

Courtesy | Ruth Bitsui
Ruth G. Bitsui, her husband, Edison Bitsui, and their son, Jeremiah Bitsui.

Everything was going fine when Edison decided to switch from heeler to header. After roping a particularly spunky steer, Edison was thrown from his horse, and “the steer took him and smashed him into the ground,” Ruth recalled. As the other cowboys raced to help him and a stunned Ruth watched the love of her life bleeding into the sand of the arena, one thought came to her mind and stuck there: “Our lives have changed forever.”

That turned out to be an understatement. The next five years were a “haze” of hospitals, rehabs and nursing homes; incomprehensible bills; falls, and incessant laundry; sleep deprivation and repeated downsizing as the vivacious retiree transitioned in an instant to fulltime caregiver for the formerly strong and vibrant man who used to care for her.

There were many moments of grace as well. “I learned that the human spirit is so strong,” reflected Ruth, “and there is a God. He works through people.”

In the last two years, after Edison passed in 2021, Ruth worked through her grief and morass of conflicting emotions by writing her account of the accident and its aftermath.

“It was mostly for me to process what I had gone through and was still going through,” she said. “But it occurred to me a lot of other people are going through similar things, and it might help them to know they’re not alone. When I was looking for material, I just didn’t see anyone who had a similar experience.”

Courtesy | Ruth Bitsui
Ruth G. Bitsui is the author of “Traumatic Brain Injury: A Caregiver’s Journey.”

In “Traumatic Brain Injury: A Caregiver’s Journey,” Ruth chronicles her story from meeting Edison at age 19 to June 14, 2021 — the day Edison “went to bed and never woke up.” The book can function on one level as an instruction manual; letting caregivers and future caregivers know what to expect. But, at its core, it is a love story — Ruth’s love for Edison, but also his for her as he tried so hard to heal. And the love of Ruth’s siblings, son, daughter-in-law, and grandchildren, “who were the reason I was able to get through this,” she said.

If you think you can’t relate to this story, you might want to think again. “The Baby Boom generation are elderly now,” Ruth said. “There are going to be a whole bunch of kids who are going to have to take care of us.

“It comes down to three things,” she continued. “Time, resources and devotion. If you lack any one of those, you probably won’t be a caregiver. But if you have all of them, you definitely will.”

“Traumatic Brain Injury: A Caregiver’s Journey” is available in paperback for $15.99 on amazon.com.